Fighting for Financial Self-Defense

I recently took a self-defense class. Other than the discovery of muscles I was unaware existed, I walked out the doors of the studio thinking I was pretty darn invincible. Such confidence boosts don’t come easily these days, so I thought it worth the time to examine the experience in the hope I can apply some of these self-defense concepts to a woman’s financial confidence.

The first thing our instructors did was go over the rule: there are no rules! You don’t have to be polite. You go ahead and make your attacker feel like an idiot for choosing the wrong victim because you are a bad- um, let’s say “bad-lass”. (I’m sorry, I know it doesn’t hold the same weight as the actual word, but it will have to do. If you’re actually in the situation of protecting yourself, don’t be afraid to cuss like a sailor if it helps you get in touch with your tough side.)

Ladies, we tend to be nice, and it’s a good thing because the world could use a little more civility. But there are certain situations where nice needs to give way to self-protection. If you have ever seen a woman go “Mama Bear” on someone to protect her cubs, you know she’s a scary foe. So we are definitely capable of defending others. For some reason, we women often need to be given permission to protect ourselves, and the same is true in money situations. That is why many experts in the financial planning profession are encouraging women to take care of their retirement savings before paying for a child’s expensive college education. It’s our nature to protect the nest, but sometimes we need to rise above our nature and do what needs to be done.

My instructors’ next point left me incredulous: “If you know the right moves, you can get away from anybody no matter how big they are.” It turns out every human body has vulnerable points that are susceptible in a skirmish. Chances are an attacker chose you because he thought you would refuse to fight back. Imagine the power of both your counter-attack on his weak points plus the element of surprise you have going for you. At the end of our lesson, I had a huge guy (a tae kwon do black belt, no less) try to choke me, and I got out of that hold in 3 seconds. Bad-lass, indeed!

What about your finances, do you believe you can overcome anything if you know the right moves? If you think that’s a ridiculous statement, I understand. I have been in financial situations that seemed insurmountable. But for every story of hesitance like ours, there is an inspirational story of women overcoming tremendous financial hurdles. This financial choke hold you’re in can be broken, it may take more than three seconds, but it is possible. You just need to know where to start.

Like self-defense, fighting your way to financial health will take a considerable amount of practice as you hone your skills to react with the proper (not necessarily natural) responses. I see my clients turn their financial lives around on a regular basis. I can tell you, it’s worth it.

As I look back on the lesson, I can’t help but wonder what would happen if all women took a self-defense course. We could effectively put an end to the bad guys who plan on an easy mark, because  – while we may look like ladies – they would soon learn we were bad-lasses in a fight. And if all women stuck up for themselves in their financial lives, imagine the influence it would have on families, not to mention our economy. Financially sturdy consumers make for stronger markets.

What would it take for you to “stick up for yourself” in a financial sense? Here are some of the goals I collaborate on with my financial coaching clients:

• Eradicate consumer debt.
• Establish an emergency fund.
• Create positive cash flow.
• Set up a system to put a savings plan in place (retirement, education, etc.)
• Make sure your “weakest points” are covered with insurance where it is affordable.
• Hire a trust-worthy financial advisor to handle your investments and/or long-term financial plans.
• Build up your financial confidence. With a little knowledge, you can often get out of any less-than-ideal situation.

And if you need a confidence boost, go take a self-defense course. Those instructors can transform ladies into bad-lasses in an hour.

Many thanks to Harbour Pointe Dong’s Karate Studio for the lesson. They provide free lessons once a month as a community service. I’m pretty sure I speak for all in attendance when I say we had a blast and we appreciate the offering. To find a class in your area, contact local martial arts studios, or Google “free self-defense class” and your city.